fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize
