PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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