i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
