I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
