She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
