Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
