As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
