if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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