Pregnant stripper...not hot.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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