Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
