Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
