I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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