he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
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