Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
