Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
