Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
