Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Randomize