brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
