I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
