Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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