You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
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