were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
