if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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