If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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