I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize
