you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
