if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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