me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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