I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
