Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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