I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
