You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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