We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
