White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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