I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
