There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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