after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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