so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
