I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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