i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
