Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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