its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My penis needs a shock collar
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
My vagina is very pro this idea
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
