I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
