So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
