yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
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