well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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