It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
