Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I think im going to throw up on grandma
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
