dude i'm inner monologue high
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Can I color on your dick again?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
