Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
